Attention: Fans of comic books (and irony)

Hi. I'll keep my introduction swift. You can call me Nairb McDuck. Max Rebos real-life brother. Once upon a time, I would fill a santa hat with miscellaneous sweets and hand them out to all the delinquents at school. These days, not much has changed. Instead of delicious candy, I offer my words, and instead of a santa hat, I have this here blog. Gather 'round so I can tell y'all a story that is sure to chill your bones and instill you with a deeper appreciation for the lack of comedy (for lack of a better word) in your universe as opposed to mine. Hold on tight. It's gonna be a bumpy ride.

*Ahem*

Okay, so my life is hilarious and ironic. Unreasonable and ridiculous events occur on an aggravating basis and I've come to expect it; the lack of karmic balance in my corner of the universe has remained constant since I was old enough to pick up on such things and as much as it pisses me off I try my best to go with the flow. I'm sure that this is no different from many of you so you should know what I'm talking about.

However, last night was a little different. "Why was last night so special?" one might ask. Allow me to explain. In one of my many adventures across this fair land I've managed to accidentally stumble across a modest pile of comic books. The when and where are insignificant. They sat in my backpack for a few days until I finally unpacked them and placed them amongst all of the other old stuff I've been collecting in the corner of my room (i.e. vinyl, old books, etc.). Last night I decided to do a bit of research online and I found out quite a bit of information on these comics. Most of them are from the late seventies, specifically 1977 and 1978. They were in pretty darn good shape so I suspected that at least a few of them might be worth some cash and it looks like I was right. I calculated a rough estimate by looking at a couple different resources and the number I came up with decent. It wasn't extraordinary but it was something.

But there was one comic that eluded my attention. I didn't notice it at first, which is ironic in itself because I'm a self-proclaimed Star Wars geek of sorts and this was an original Marvel brand Star-Wars comic. In fact, there were four of them. One through four. So, I looked them up. In comparison, these comics are all nearly identical except for one striking detail: the fourth issue features a square around the price tag (which is thirty-five cents) rather than a diamond, which is featured on the other three. Because of this minor aesthetic difference, this particular comic book is worth over one thousand dollars.

Part of my brain was ecstatic. Thoughts and fantasies of bills being paid, Christmas gifts being bought, and chocolate soy-milk being gulped flashed past my focus like high beams on the thru-way at night. But I knew better than this. I walk in these shoes every day and I adhere to the most influential fundamental law that governs events in my life: irony. So after inspecting the comic up and down I found what I was looking for. To be short, the comic is in beautiful condition given its age; there are no creases in the paper, all the pages are intact and the color is far from fading away, but what makes all of this so common place and predictable is that there are no staples in the binding and the actual comic is not attached to the cover, so (unless I'm wrong) it's pretty much worthless.

ZOMG.

All of the other comics in the pile have their staples. Some of them are in questionable condition but if you look at the edge you will find those goddamn staples right where they're supposed to be, doing what they're supposed to do.

I'm pretty sure there is nothing left to be said. My life is hilarious and ironic. Unreasonable and ridiculous events occur on an aggravating basis and I've come to expect it; the lack of karmic balance in my corner of the universe has remained constant since I was old enough to pick up on such things and as much as it pisses me off I try my best to go with the flow. I'm sure that this is no different from many of you so you should know what I'm talking about.

*Sigh*